Thursday, July 26, 2012

Downward Facing Mom - Part 1



Here is an analogy to help get your brain going, get in a proper frame of mind to read the rest of this post and prepare you for that SAT test you'll be taking soon.

Beautiful outdoor wedding : Hurricane Gloria \  Mom working out: __________

A) Brownies
B) Children
C) Pinterest
D) Margarita

If you need a clue, ask yourself which of the choices is an unstoppable force of nature that can annihilate anything that comes in its path - including peace and joy.

The answer is A, brownies.  I kid - of course its B.

This begs the question then, why would my children want me to be flabby?  Why?
What possible benefit would they get from me being crowned the Muffin Top Queen at the state fair this year.

I must admit that apparently I'm a bit misguided in the notion that exercise equals healthy, amazing body.  I keep hearing from a myriad of sources that diet is 75% to 80% of a factor in the way you look and feel.  Exercise is only the other 20 to 30%.  Poo.  I like the old way when I thought I could exercise to compensate for my Ding Dong and cheese intake. Why did God make Randy's Pizza taste so nummy? Sigh. Oh well.

So despite the fact that exercising may or may not give me the flat abs that I long for, it is most certainly a major source of stress relief for me.  A time to decompress and release some tension.  Being that my offspring are a major source of stress in my life, they are a primary reason for my need to exercise. Of course I love them dearly and they offer me much joy as well, but on a good day the joy, stress ratio is about 50/50.

Children and a Mom's Body Image

 We grew them on the insides of our bodies.  Bodies that became stretched, squishy, torn and disproportionate.   So if that wasn't enough, once they begin to talk they can become your own personal truth speaking discourager like the surly high school gym coaches of yore.  "Mommy, your tummy feels like a pillow."  Mommy, why does your bottom jiggle?"  Mommy what are those lines on your thighs?"
About three days after I had given birth to my son, my daughter, who was 3 1/2 at the time, was going to accompany me to the grocery store.  As I was getting her into the car she patted my stomach and informed me that it was squishy.  She then looked at my stomach, looked up at my face, looked back at my stomach and asked me if I really wanted to go to the store with my squishy tummy.
Thanks, daughter.  That was a real confidence booster.  Because I wasn't feeling self-concious at all about my body.  I will still go to the store despite my "squishy tummy," but now I'm not so sure you should come because I'm nervous you might approach some random grocery store shopper and ask them if they left their spanx at home.


Children and Running

Unless your children are school age or you are able to afford a sitter or gym membership that offers childcare or you are able to get up before your husband leaves for work, you will need to push your children in a jogging stroller to get your run in.  This will involve the added benefits of increasing your strength and will hone your ability to bight your tongue and not swear when you're attempting to push your double stroller up a 15% grade hill.

Then come the questions and the dialogue.  "What's that dog's name?" "How much longer?"  "What's that noise?" "I'm hungry."  "I'm thirsty."  "What's your opinion on the origins of the universe?"  And my favorite is, when going up a steep hill and I slow down because I'm sucking air and dripping sweat like a iced beverage on a 100 degree day.. "Why are we going slow?  Run faster mom."

I've also had to be creative at times, like going to a park where I can run around them or back and forth in front of them. This would inevitably end up with them finding a patch of mud to smother themselves with, or fighting or boredom, all of which lead to interrupting me.  More on interruptions when I explore the at home work out.

I will say that sometimes it is nice to have a little companion with me on those days when it's not too hot, the terrain is pretty flat and the humidity is low.  I do miss playing peek-a-boo through the little "sun roof" on the top of our stroller with the younger versions of my kids.

What have your children done to help your wellness?

The second and third installments of Downward Facing Mom will include: 'Children and Yoga' and 'Children and Working Out'


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